Thursday, November 19, 2009

Bathrobes

This piece of clothing is perplexing to me. Are they even considered clothing? A lot of times they're made of terry cloth so that's half towel, right. It lives in the bathroom instead of the closet, so when my clothes get into crazy battles while I'm away at work (as everyone knows they do) it's gonna be on Team Towels and fuck my jeans and underpants up. It's probably cool with shirts though, they both have sleeves so they're like cousins I imagine. But if I was a robe I would be mad bitter about never getting to leave the house so maybe I would knife a cardigan.

And are they sexy? I can see how they should be, cause you're nekkie underneath, but people look so frumpy and un-hot in bathrobes that it makes me lose all desire to have them remove it.

Anyways, I never had a robe growing up and a few years ago I asked my then-boif for one and he ended up getting me two; a "Summer Robe" and a "Winter Robe." Summer robe is green and lightweight and really short (American Apparel at it's slutty best) and I loved it until I had a slumber party with a male friend of mine who maybe said it was hot but also called it "comically shortened." I still wear it, but always eye it suspiciously first.

I was rocking Winter Robe a few weeks ago when Blair stopped by. It was poor timing, as I had just gotten out of the shower and my nose was bleeding for reasons not involving drugs. Blair had picked up a picture of us from about five years ago and said, "Aww, you look so good here, so happy." To which I responded, "As opposed to what?" and he said, "Uh, I dunno, running around in a big frumpy white robe with a bloody nose at three in the afternoon."

So, I think I will be going back to the trusty drip dry and quietly lay my robe dreams to rest. Shanon owns four, by the way.

1 comment:

  1. Yes I own 4:

    1. for sexy lounging after bath (made of silk)
    2. for smoking cigars after bath (it's plaid and made of wool - purchased when I first got into Mad Men)
    3. for actually getting dry
    4. a backup getting dry one

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