Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Dirty of the Day

Fish are kind of stupid and I don't see the appeal of having one as a pet. You can't play with them or pet them, they don't do funny things like cats and they're not particularly cute. Cleaning their bowls or aquariums is a bitch too. And I eat fish sometimes and think something is not right about owning a pet you would pair with some saki and eat on the regs.

A few years back, my ex boif and I acquired a fish, not by choice, but we took him in, figuring he would last a few months. It was one of those Japanese "fighting fish" and it was fun to hold a mirror up to him and make him get all puffed up and think he was about to do battle with another fish. It was really just his reflection though! Stupid fish. We named him Johnny Lottacock. Motherfucker lived for two years.

The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in her ass (or his if you are in prison). Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. Thanks, Andy.

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