Wednesday, January 20, 2010


The back, lower right side of my head has hurt for some time now. Mostly just when I press it and it's not unbearable or anything, but I know it's there, I don't know why, and it's apparently decided to set up shop for awhile. Naturally, I did what I presume everyone does when something mildly discomforting happens to them; freak out, assume the worst and annoy the fuck out of my friends (Shanon).

She then informed me that apparently when you catch the mens, you can't move your neck, so we ruled that out, but I still decided to pay a visit to the only doctor I can afford, Going on manages to scare the crap out of me and at the same time makes my troubles seem inconsequential because I start reading about all this other stuff that can go wrong, until I eventually forget why I went to the site in the first place. For instance, today when I went to the "Symptom Checker" and clicked on the Head region, all these nutty possible symptoms popped up, so I started checking them off to see what could cause things like a "Fear of water" and oh shit, did you know that means you have rabies? I did not. My favorite though, was a "Craving to eat ice, dirt, or paper," because I picture someone sitting in front of their computer, thinking to themselves, "Man, I could really go for a taco made of paper, stuffed with dirt, perhaps with a side of ice, what the fuck is wrong with me" and so they log onto good old Webmd and discover they didn't catch a case of the cray, they are just Anemic! And lookee that, I am now too busy wondering what it feels like to fear water and crave mud pies to think about how I still feel like I got donkeypunched.

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