Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Boney Island

This past Saturday was Coney Island's annual Mermaid Parade and since Shanon and I have both lived in New York for a decade now, we finally decided to see what it was all about. Wild stuff. I had the feeling like when you go to a renaissance fair and people are so into it that you know this is the highlight of their year and you wonder what they possibly do with the other 364 days of their life when they're not a merperson or part of a human chess set. Then I remembered I hate parades and so we decided to go lay on the beach instead.

Here are some primo quotes from our day:

"If someone saves your life from a fire you have to have sex with them." (Musings on whether firemen get round the clock poon)

"This is why we need to get rich - Boats. Then you don't even fuck around with the beach." (Noting how happy the people on boats looked and how packed like sardines the beach was)

"I never thought I would see that in my life." (These two chicks that we thought were dudes who were actually deaf lesbians*)

And here are some primo pics I took:

What's that Shanon is wearing, you say? FLIP FLOPS. Truly never thought I'd see this day, let alone have proof of it.

It's nice when people bring their pianos to the boardwalk.

Our view.

I took this pic cause my periscope was aimed at Cap'n Boner in the white hat, but I got sidetracked by the nutty washboard this chick was playing, that had a tin can and a cymbal strapped to it and she was wearing castanets on her hand! What the what. Hmm, she's kind of a babe too, I bet her & Boners Ahoy totally knock sandy hipster boots. Fuck you and your beautiful imaginary children.

Speaking of hot kids, this group of teenage punks set up shop right next to us and so Shanon and I did what any 28 year old would - made rape eyes and tried to lure them in with Coronas and cigarettes. The one reclining shirtless was our favorite. Too bad I couldn't zoom in on his rat tail. It was glorious.

*Name of our new band.

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