It's been a slow week here on ye olde brog, so let's just get right into it - I am a drunk multimedia superhero. Last night at an event I threw together (you know, in my spare time), I. Got. Drunk. So drunk that I then proceeded to terrorize my coworkers via email, phone, and text. Hence Jenny's dubbing me the 21st Century Business Drunk.
During the event itself I texted an intern the following three things in a row:
"Come to the back and hang out with me and my buddy Jenny." (pervy!)
"Where u go mojo."
"Whaaaa I just want to eat candy."
Then I went home and emailed my entire team this gem: "Dudes - I may be drunk, but not a single one of you showed up to our party tonight. Thanks a whole fucking lot for the support." When I got to work this morning my boss said to me, "I forgot what it's like working with women. You have so many feelings."
And finally, I called one of my Canadian coworkers and left him a voicemail. He said he listened to it at 4am and it was "extra weird." I have no idea what I said.
So you see, I am the drunken master of the business world. And my best pal Jenny was kind enough to draw a photo of this (click to enlarge).
Clockwise it reads like this:
- Blackberry text reads "FARTS"
- "Who likes Schubert?! Where is that intern! I don't see any tacos!! Fuck you cabby! I just dropped a baby snake in the men's room! Pizza!!" (p.s. These were all things I said last night, no joke)
- "King George (trusty sidekick)"
- "Navajo Print Blazer"
- "Dykey hikey boots"
- "Powersuit shoulderpads"
- "(Poor tattoo choice)"
Oh yeah, and that RV on my saggy-tittied t-shirt is a special nickname that Chris gave me - Red Velvet.
And if that weren't enough, Shandy (straight Andrew) drew a pic of me too, apparently at the exact same time Jenny drew hers but completely unrelated. And in case you can't read that either, it says "Giant Juggs" and "Unusual Feet."
Happy Friday, everyone. I'm hungover.